Relating Without Anger
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Relating Without Anger

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I believe you are here because you have some inner knowing that relating without anger is better. I am giving you all some information as to why that inner knowing, knows. I am giving you all some big picture perspective so you can better live your lives.

What do we Want?

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"Relating Without Anger" has Acceptance as we R. Relating with anger has Rejection, "Relating Without Anger" has Love as we R. Relating with anger has Hate. "Relating Without Anger" has Influence with Respect. Relating with anger has Reaction, Resistance and Resentment. "Relating Without Anger" has Caring. Relating with anger has Abandonment and Indifference. "Relating Without Anger" has Peace. Relating with anger has Warring. Who wants acceptance, love, influence, caring and peace?

How do we often want to get it?

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The lazy way. Force others to do what we want. Control others. What happens? It comes back on us. It does not work in the long run. It is harder to do. It is not the efficient way.

What do we get?

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Don't we get both what we want and what we do not want? Didn't we give both what we wanted and whaat we did not want in the past?

What is Wise to Give?

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Would it not be easier to start giving more of what we want so we will get more of what we want?

Who Bats 1000?

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I do not. I do not know anyone who does. So what. I just want to keep improving my percentage.

Why Increase Your Average?

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These look like good reasons to me. Don't they sound like good reasons to you? I feel good about them.

Why Decrease Your Average?

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I would like to see these improvements. How do they sound to you all? I feel good about them.

What Is Anger, Really?

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Anger and all emotions are just energy we feel. Anger has a purpose.

What is Anger # 1?

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One purpose is to keep us safe. Another purpose is to enjoy life.

What is Anger #2?

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Another purpose to make plans and to carry out the plans.

What Two Kinds of Anger?

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The energy we generate can heal or hurt.

The Hurting Process

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This is what a lot of people on this planet do and are taught to do.

The Healing Process

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The spiritual experiences usuall happen in rage work where the client has enough forgiving experiences to know they want to do that. The spirituaI experiences are unique for the person doing the work. I would not be interested in working with someone in rage work unless they had the basics of forgiveness down.

How to Transform Angers?

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HOW NOT TO FORGIVE

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HOW TO FORGIVE

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Generic Names to Forgive

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Core & Projections

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I have never worked with anyone in depth where I did not find that core of loving and understanding. We usually do not relate from our core of loving and understanding until we have forgiven enough. We usually relate from aspects of our personality. When pushed or tired we can sometimes relate from our alien aspects. The alien aspects we see in others we usually judge it as bad and wrong. That is our negative projection. The core aspects we see in others we usually judge it as good and right. That is our positive projection.

How to Forgive Others

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Forgiving Slide

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Learn How To Forgive

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Healing by Feeling

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Levels of Healing

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Levels of Healing

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How We Think Effects How We Feel

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At Peace

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First Step

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Did Not Smoke Were Not Angry, Was Not Angry Were Peaceful

Action Steps

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Step Change Process

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Impulse Change Process

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Ramp Change Process

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Forgiving Judgments

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Strength Returns

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Truth Exploring

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More Exploring

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Thinking Positive

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Change of Heart

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Teaching Lessons

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New Adventure

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Cost Benefit Analysis

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What Are Your Choices?

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Strength Demonstration

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Inner Archetypes

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Archetypes Transformation Therapy from the Enneagram work: We can be accurately described by various levels of nine major archetypes. Each of our nine archetypes can be assisted in growing up into a healthy aspect by our tenth, our spiritual beingness. Our first archetype is our “Inner Critic.” Our second archetype is our “Inner Mother.” Our third archetype is our “Inner Entrepreneur or Creator”. Our fourth archetype is our “Inner Actor”. Our fifth archetype is our “Inner Scholar”. Our sixth archetype is our “Inner Child”. Our seventh archetype is our “Inner Clown”. Our eight archetype is our “Inner Father”. Our ninth archetype is our “Inner Peacemaker or Inner Coach”. All of our aspects can be put under the guidance of our inner spiritual being which is connected to all of spirit.

Reality Therapy by Glasser

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Reality Therapy from Glasser: How you life is going? If you do not like how your life is going, make a plan to improve your life. Take action steps on your plan. Celebrate success and forgive yourself and others all your failures. Learn to be empathic with yourself. Return to the first question, make a new plan, take action steps, celebrate and forgive.

Spiritual ReAuthoring Lives

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Spiritual Psychology of Learning Loving from our spiritual teachers & USM & Michael White: What if we are spiritual beings? All of these above processes are spiritual when done from the attitude of loving. We facilitate this loving by positive self talk. The most powerful tool to create a new reality is the process of reauthoring your spiritual journey in a process like: Tell and Write your spiritual journey story first from the physical, then the mental, then the emotional, then the spiritual points of view. Then you can re author your stories with better outcomes in the physical, mental, emotional and spiritual worlds. Your physical story description includes words that describe the physical scenes and your physical experiences. Your mental story description includes words that analyze the scenes. Your emotional story description includes emotional words that tell about the scenes. Your spiritual story descriptions tell how every thing is a blessing or a blessing in disguise. Then your stories have been re authored to describe the ideal scenes that you are going for.

Focusing on Your Felt Sense

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Focusing on Your Felt Sense from Dr. Gendlin. In the Bible it says “Be still and know that I am God”. In Zen they say "Not knowing is the most intimate." This is the state of being at the edge of your feelings as your not knowing turns into knowing. This is where all the steps of focusing come together in the moment. This is the state of communion with spirit, your innermost being. Focusing breaks the moment process into steps to learn how to trust and commune with your highest connection to spirit. That is why successful therapy is about getting in contact with our feelings and recovery is about recovering our feelings. That is why this leads to healing hurts, resolving emotions, finding peace.

Neural Linguistic Partnering

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Neural Linguistic Partnering from Bandler, Dilts, et all. We can communicate to all our parts or aspects and get cooperation with our goals and plans. We are the Wizards in OZ. We can learn to Program our Neural system by our Linguistics. We just forgot to take command and then to give command to all our aspects.

Relating With Yourself

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What We Really Want

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Summary

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