Coach's Hint of the Day for the Week

RBD's Wellness Coach's Hints for Fellow Travelers on The Road to Recovery for 27 Apr to 3 May 98.

Page Down for the next days that are added a day at a time, in the evening this week.

I have moved to https://www.recoverybydiscovery.com. I was having a problem getting through on Prodigy Internet so I used Prodigy Classic. I solved my challenge by more effective prayer using my presentation from the last few weeks.

This daily page is now here at https://www.recoverybydiscovery.com/daily.htm when you choose to bookmark.

I would appreciate any feedback, questions and suggestions that you have.

27 Apr 98

"Recovery, Spiritual or Physical?"

I am reading a book by a medical psychiatrist doctor on "The Good News About PANIC, ANXIETY & PHOBIAS". His name is Mark S. Gold, M.D. The doctor's thesis is that panic, anxiety and phobias can also come from physical causes instead of just mental causes and can sometimes be cured by physical means. He tends to not understand cures by spiritual means. I am learning from what he has written and he could learn from what I have written.

My thesis is that it is wiser to use both physical and spiritual means to recover. Our physical recovery goes better as we change our mind about spiritual issues. Our mental recovery goes better as we change our physical My thesis is that spiritual recovery is the most important, but we need to take care of the physical because part of the spiritual is honoring and nurturing the physical.

It is also most important to be careful of WHO we hire for our physical and for our spiritual coaching. I did not say mental assistance, because in my experience, all mental changes of mind have to do with the spiritual. All of the outcome research on therapy I am aware of tells me that the healing came from spiritual processes, whether the processes are called that or not. The same is true of the physical processes.

28 Apr 98

Who we hire to coach us brings up the question of HOW we hire them.

For me now, how I hire someone to assist me has to do with finding a good friend.
- A good friend that I can trust to keep my highest good in mind .
- A good friend where we have a two way relationship.
- A good friend that I can learn from and will learn from me.
- A good friend that really listens to what I want and have to say.
- A good friend that temporarily knows more in the area I need assistance.

I wrote "coach us" on purpose. I am not hiring help or just assistance. I am helping myself by finding a coach that temporarily knows more, so that I can learn that also. I do not need to learn the details, but I do need to learn the essence of what they know. How else can we communicate as friends?

One of the characteristics of those that recover better is that they take responsibility for their recovery. A paradoxical characteristic of those that recover better is that they also surrender to their process, provided by their lord most high within.

29 Aug 98

Spirit is not a woman or a man, it contains both masculine and feminine characteristics, without the blame factor. That is what helped me recover.

The truth is that in spiritual therapy there is no difference due to sex, race, national origin, age, etc. Recovery always works the same for those willing to work it. That is the way I have experienced spirit and from that perspective one sees how things really balance. What the common view is, rarely has much to do with what is.

We are all beautiful roses with some thorns. The fact that I have recovered from some things and others I have worked with have recovered from some things does not mean that we do not have more thorns to remove, it just means that we know better how to cooperate with our thorn removal process.

Everybody is in process, the only difference is whether they are in the blame game or in forgiving living and what percentage of each.

30 Apr 98

Someone like Dr. Gold that I wrote about on 27 Apr is an expert on the physical and behavior therapy for psychiatric challenges. I am an expert on the spiritual therapy for psychiatric challenges. I would like to work with doctors that are open to seeing how the spiritual can assist the physical and behavior therapies.

So, I am interested in teaming with anyone interested in teaming our efforts in support of whoever wants to recover and is ready to learn more spiritual and life skills. When you have any leads I would be grateful for them.

31 Apr 98

The book "Smart Women, Foolish Choices" has an insight

that many smart women pick the bad guy over the nice men

because the bad guy is more exciting. I gave a copy to my

daughter and I guess she thought I was insulting her. The

results were that she picked a really nice man and is leading

a happier and less dramatic life. She is provoking him on

her issues & vice versa, the difference is that they are in better

shape to help each other work them out. The same thing would

have been true if I had a son that was getting excited about a

bad girl. I would have given him the same book and crossed

out the "wo" in "women". It is just better to work out your issues

with a good woman than a bad girl. I know that one from

personal experience. Not that the other would not have

been more exciting. The trouble is that kind of excitement

is the soap opera kind of excitement called misery. Even so,

I had more drama than I though I would.

1 May 98

If I was the parent of a "bad girl or guy", I would know that

they had some kind of wound that needed healing. In that

case I would be encouraging them and empowering them

to resolve their issues before they married. Perhaps even

encouraging them to learn how to be a therapist, most

importantly, of themselves. Knowing what I know now,

I would have worked through more issues & the quality

of those that showed up would have been up. That is

what I will tell my grandchildren & that I have been grateful

for what I did find.

2 May 98

That way when a bad girl marries a bad guy they can be

helped by social workers that hopefully had worked through

their issues. That way when there is divorce or the equivalent

when there is a badly wounded partner from a "bad girl or guy"

they can find a therapist that has worked through their issues

and have found some paths through that dark forest with their

more supporting partners. That way when the bad girls and

guys hit their bottoms they can find their 12 steps back to

their heaven within.

3 May 98

If you have read what I have written in the past you know I

do not mean "bad" in judgmental terms, I only mean worse

wounded. I have wondered from time to time what would have

happened if I had married that worse wounded one. Perhaps

I would have hit my bottom faster & got on my spiritual search

sooner. Perhaps she was enough of a rebel to have gone with

me. I know it would have been more miserable for a while

until I found a better way. Perhaps I would have been divorced

and would still be paying for that. Who knows... I do know now

that it would have been a different system and there would have

been different results. I also now know that anywhere along the

process, I could have changed the results for both of us.

Your Wellness Coach,

Michael Foster

"Learn HOW to recovery by discovering the blocks you need to remove and the actions you need to take and what you need to let go of as your blocks to your blessings."

From my book in process, The Generic Spirituality Cookbook (Recipes for a Better Life)

If you would like a free monthly newsletter with coach's hints on a single subject, click RBD's Free Monthly Newsletter Registration Form.

I started my daily page, because it is useful for me to look for some recovery tip or secret each day for my spiritual growth. we and I only need one secret to work on and let it work on me each day. They are secrets because they are usually the opposite of what the majority of society teaches. They must be secret because they are not commonly used. A friend of mine once said "Common Sense is not much in Common.". Now that I have grandchildren I am also writing for them. I would have really liked for my grandparents to have passed on what they learned.

I am including Sunday as it is my formal day of learning the lord most high's secrets. If you would like ask questions, or contribute some of your wisdom, or want to make some comments or want to vote for which day to put on my tip of the month page or tell your success stories, click Michael Foster, M. A.

Congratulations on being one of the precious ones to discover this page since 10 Apr 98.

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