The Wholeness Consultant's Hint of the Day for the Week

RBD's Wellness Coach's Hints for Fellow Travelers on The Road to Recovery for 15 to 21 June 98.

Published Last Week

Page Down for the next days that are added a day at a time.

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I would appreciate any feedback, questions and suggestions that you have.

What I am going through now is the DSM-III-R Desk Reference a

"Disorder" at a time and commenting on the spiritual and recovery

aspects. The DSM is what the American Psychiatric Association

uses to label symptoms to facilitate communication in their community.

Unfortunately, the labeling from the DSM can shut down communication

with those seeking temporary assistance. The DSM can bring comfort

by telling some that others have had the same experience. I am adding

additional comfort by pointing to some ways out of the "Disorders".

15 Jun 98 [302.85]

"Gender Identity Disorder of Adolescence or Adulthood, Nontranssexual Type".

Same as transsexualism without preoccupation of changing sexual characteristics

or cross dressing for excitement. This is just on the same scale as transsexualism

at a lower level of obsession. [302.85] "Gender Identity Disorder Not Otherwise

Specified" is just on the same scale as transsexualism at a lower level of obsession.

See 13 and 14 June 98 for comments.

New Subject:

[307.23] "Tourette's Disorder". [307.22] "Chronic Motor or Vocal Tic

Disorder" . [307.21] "Transient Tic Disorder". [307.20] "Tic Disorder Not

Otherwise Specified". These are all different types of tics. Tics are involuntary

movements and or vocal expressions. Tourette's can be interesting because it

sometimes includes swearing. For me, to keep it simple, involuntary movements

and or vocal expressions include any compulsions. There is a range of suppression

possible, from none to almost totally, just like with any other characteristic.

I have had involuntary movements and vocal expressions that I did not

consciously generate. Most people have experiences some kind of these,

like cramps that came upon them. The more dramatic ones I experienced

were like a teeth chattering like I saw in babies shortly after their birth trauma.

Then there is yawning, scratching an itch, laughing and things like this.

Tomorrow, we will consider what can be done to assist in recovery.

16 Jun 98

What did I do to recover from my involuntary movements and vocal

expressions that I did not consciously generate? I turned them over to the

Holy Spirit and then cooperated with letting them happen and letting them

go. Suppressing them would have only made them stronger. That which

we resist, persist. That which we suppress, expresses. So, I did two things,

first I did nothing by not resisting and not suppressing. Second I made the

Holy Spirit responsible for my recovery. The only thing I really did was to

find enough patience to let my process happen and let my process complete.

You see, tics are a release mechanism. So are obsessions and compulsions.

The obsession is more in the mind and the compulsion has moved on to action.

"ob-ses-sion (uhb sesh'uhn) n. 1. the domination of one's thoughts or

feelings by a persistent idea, image, desire, etc. 2. the idea, image, desire,

etc., itself. 3. the state of being obsessed. com-pul-sion (kuhm pul'shuhn) n.

1. the act of compelling; constraint; coercion. 2. the state or condition of being

compelled. 3. a strong, usually irresistible impulse to perform an act, esp. one

that is irrational or contrary to one's will." From Webster's Electronic Dictionary

1.0.

Tics and obsessions and compulsions also have a gestalt. They are telling us

something that we would be wise to forgive and wise to assert something else.

They are an incentive to ask the Holy Spirit, "What to do or not do?" and "What

art they telling me to forgive and assert?"

17 Jun 98 [307.70 and 307.60]

"Functional Encopresis and Enuresis" which means not able to hold on to

your feces and urine when over four mentally. Actually they are beginning to

find that physical development may often take more than four years. However

a ritual of forgiveness around this metaphor would be wise to use until it works.

Positive assertions around giving control of these functions to the Holy Spirit are

always of use.

[307.00] "Cluttering and Stuttering" are essentially tics of speech. See tics.

[313.23] "Elective Mutism" is refusing to speak even though they could? We

have all done that at some time, at least I have. I was upset and that is the way

I was protesting. Upset is anger, forgiving turns anger into hurt and forgiving

the hurt turns into healing and positive energy to do positive things.

18 Jun 98 [313.82]

"Identity Disorder" is identity issues with goals, career, friends, sex, religion,

morals, loyality, school, work, etc. Identity issues are about confusion about

what we really want and do not want. We all have degrees of this confusion.

Any lack of clarity we have is from the fog of forms of anger. The question

becomes one of learning how to have clarity.

Clarity comes from learning how to forgive. Clarity comes from learning

how to start with accepting what is already. Clarity comes from declaring

our clarity. Confusion is an advantage since it is easier to change states

when we are in our fog of confusion. Each of the areas of lack of identity

is an opportunity to work with the Holy Spirit on what our mission is in

each area.

19 Jun 98

Today we are going to take a break from the DSM list of mental illnesses

and consider the family system. The DSM does not take the larger systems

into account. All of these symptoms of the "identified patient" really also the

symptoms of the family system all the way up to the world system.

When you are interested in how family systems work and how we can

help the whole family system heal, I can recommend a good book to help.

This book describes how the family healing process works when there are

those that are willing to get into the family's struggle.

First some background that many may not be aware of where they

discovered some family system patterns in families with schizophrenic

patients. First they noted that the "patient" became worse when the mother

visited. Then they noted that the mothers often had a similar personality pattern.

Then they noted that the fathers often had a similar personality pattern. Then

they noted that when the identified patient began to get better someone else in

the family system began to get worse. So, it is easier to help an identified

patient when the whole family comes to learn how to get better. That is why

I have a page on getting well "in spite of" others.

The book is "The Family Crucible, The Intense Experience of Family

Therapy" by Augustus Y. Napier, Ph.D., with Carl Whitaker, M.D. Carl

is one of the pioneers of the family therapy process.

20 Jun 98 [313.89]

"Reactive Attachment Disorder of Infancy or Early Childhood" is about a

family system disorder where the parent and child are not clicking. There is

a persistant lack of social interaction or too much interaction with strangers.

There is a lack of caring for the basic needs of the child. One can only

wonder at why the child's soul needs this and the parents' souls need this.

We all have some lack of social interaction and too much interaction

with strangers and lack of basic care at some time. This is just talking about

what it is like in the extreem. This is where starting some social interaction

with the Holy Spirit by either the parents or the child or both would start

their improvement process. Of course that starts the improvements for any

family system. As their reactivity to the Holy Spirit goes away their reactivity

to their world goes away. As their disassociation to the Holy Spirit goes

away their attachments become more healthy.

21 Jun 98 [307.30]

"Stereotypy/Habit Disorder" is described as "Intentional, repetitive,

nonfundtional behaviors, such as hand-shaking or -waving, body-rocking,

head-banging, mouthing of objects, nail-biting, picking at nose or skin."

I have quoted this because the DSM called it both a "habit" and "intentional".

A habit is only intentional, when we start the habit. After it is a habit, the

habit is in automatic, that is why we call it a habit. Some of these habits are

used by autistics to find more comfort. Some of these habits are used by low

level autistics to find more comfort. Although these habits may hurt the

person, they are there to relieve a larger hurt. Why do we have some

habits? For the same reasons.

So the real issue is how to resolve the larger hurt. The techniques are

the same, total acceptance, total assertion, total forgiveness and total teamwork.

Your Wholeness Consultant,

Michael Foster, M. A.

"Learn HOW to recovery by discovering the blocks you need to remove and the actions you need to take and what you need to let go of as your blocks to your blessings."

From my book in process, The Spiritual Cookbook (Generic Recipes for a Better Life)

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I started my daily page, because it is useful for me to look for some recovery tip or secret each day for my spiritual growth. we and I only need one secret to work on and let it work on me each day. They are secrets because they are usually the opposite of what the majority of society teaches. They must be secret because they are not commonly used. A friend of mine once said "Common Sense is not much in Common.". Now that I have grandchildren I am also writing for them. I would have really liked for my grandparents to have passed on what they learned.

I am including Sunday as it is my formal day of learning the lord most high's secrets. If you would like ask questions, or contribute some of your wisdom, or want to make some comments or want to vote for which day to put on my tip of the month page or tell your success stories, click Michael Foster, M. A.

27 May 98

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